ACFW Conference 2016

With the encouragement and pressing of my counselor and dear friend, I gathered up my courage and resources and flew across the country to Nashville, Tennessee to attend the American Christian Fiction Writers (ACFW) Conference.

To be honest, I had no idea what I was getting into. I think I had some vague idea of workshops/lectures about how to write (in a general sort of way; I hadn't thought what exactly they'd be teaching) and meeting other writers who are working on their stories. Also, though I didn't realize till I got there, I think I had assumed that a good number, if not most, of them would be fantasy writers like myself. Granted, this latter assumption probably came because most of my good friends are fantasy writers and/or enthusiasts so I thought the rest of the world was the same.

Boy was I in for a surprise.

Now to debunk all the assumptions I held coming in:
1) "workshops/lectures about how to write": OK this one wasn't actually wrong. Most of the sessions I went to were about how to create believable characters, compelling stories, realistic settings, and tasteful presentation. However, there were also lots of things like points of view (called POV and referring to whose view/head you're telling from) and platform (how visible you are, mostly via social media, to people not family and friends) that I hadn't really considered or even thought of. Also, Ted Dekker, the key note speaker, imparted some fantastic advice about writing/story sources, that the greatest stories are those about transformation and come from a place of self-discovery, learning a truth or lesson with and through the characters. By the end of the weekend, my head swam with everything I'd learned and wanted to implement. We'll see how I do in integrating them.

2) "meeting other writers who are working on their stories": Again, not entirely untrue. Everyone that I met was working on something. However, what I hadn't expected was for many to already have finished one if not several novels and a good number of the authors already published. I had thought that many would be like me, coming to this conference with very little finished and desirous of learning how to finish well. It was very humbling, and a bit intimidating, to meet people who are so much further along in the writing process than I. One thing I must say though is that everyone I met was encouraging and friendly to the utmost. While I felt a bit inadequate being there in terms of my writing, I found it comforting to be surrounded by so many who hoped, even in a casual way, for my success out of a sense camaraderie.

3) "that a good number, if not most, of them would be fantasy writers": This was probably the most erroneous of everything I thought. Most of the people I met wrote romance in some form (contemporary, historical, suspense, high-adventure). In some ways, I suppose this shouldn't have surprised me since romance is apparently the most popular genre because everyone wants love. In reality, the fantasy/sci-fy/paranormal crowd (called speculative apparently) is one of the smallest and less desireable than many of the other genres to publishers and agents. However, I was still able to meet several other fantasy writers who were lovely and encouraging.

Overall, an amazing adventure that I am very glad I took. I have returned with so many new tricks to try and processes to practice.

However, I have also returned with questions. Seeing all the complications of the publishing world and the dedication that many of the others around me possessed, it made me look at my own desire for writing. Do I want to pursue this more intentionally or allow it to stay as it is, an occasionally dabbled-in hobby? But not only was my writing passion questioned but even my relationship with God. Throughout the conference, people talked about how the Holy Spirit encouraged their writing or how their stories came out of their searches into problems with God's help. It made me face the fact that not only is my writing largely done on my  own strength but also most of the rest of my life. While I have been learning to live in grace over the last year and a half, I still have well-ingrained habits of trying to do things on my own that must go if I am to grow not only as a follower of Jesus but also as a writer. So lots to ponder.

Reflections on "A Fusion of Old and New"

Last night, my amazing brother and his incredible friend performed a recital together of classical pieces both traditional and modern thus leading them to call it "A Fusion of Old and New." Pretty self-explanatory. Aside from their flawless performances, the music was enchantingly beautiful, an intricate interplay of interwoven melodies and tempos and emotions. Quite simply: a joy to listen to. So you may be wondering, "so why the shameless plug for your brother's performance? Does it mean you'll be posting a recording of it?" Sadly, fair reader, that is not the reason for this post. The reason would be that, as the music swelled and swirled around me, I felt inspired to write and came up with my first free-form poem, which is uncharted territory for me. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I had writing it.

And here at the end of all things,
At the end of all that was,
We find ourselves affixed, transfixed,
Transfused by ghosts of time and space now gone,
Now carried into brilliant time and space as yet unseen.
Throw wide thy gates, O Ancient Doors!
Throw wide thy arms, O Stranger Friend!
With thanks and welcome, we invite and are invited
To the touching of eternity.
The funeral of what is past and birth of what is yet to be
Stay for just a moment,
A single, blissful moment,
For the marriage of the present.

Glorious Ruins

OK, I know this may be a bit of a cop out but this is something I wrote back in October but never posted or shared really. The idea of "glorious ruins" was the theme of my church's women's retreat and thus you can guess where I wrote it. I tried to capture the feeling of how something bad can become something good, that what we see as defeat can be the beginning of victory. I'm sorry if it's a bit rough.

Glorious Ruins

The walls now lie broken, battered and worn;

The banners lie lifeless, tattered and torn;

Defeat echoes loudly, tangibly felt.

No hope left within it, courage has melt.

So where is the glory, mighty to save?

So where is protection, voice in the cave?

So why are you silent, me left alone?

So what will I do now, left overthrown?

Come walk through the fire, refining though hot,

Let go of your failure, something for nought.

New life shall be yours now, dry bones alive;

My wings are your cover; love me and thrive.

The walls are now diamond, pressure made good;

The banners fly proudly, tatters withstood;

Now laughter abounds here, victory found;

These glorious ruins no longer bound.

Looking Back and Looking Forward

So I was hoping to have a finished project for these posts but it seems that that will have to wait for now. I started writing the following poem New Year's Eve so that's why it starts the way it does. However, it has become more of a reflection over how I've viewed my past year and then hopes for the one to come. I'll get to the hopes part next time. For now, I hope you enjoy and may this be the beginning of a beautiful tradition.

Looking Back and Looking Forward

Upon this dark'ning night, we wait

For the year to end,

For the new its way to wend

And memories create.

What should I say upon this day,

The last now of the year?

Should they be silly or words sincere

Or hold the tears at bay?

Yet are there words enough to hold

All the thoughts and hopes

That crossed and held like binding ropes

My life as then untold?

My words run short; my mouth runs dry;

My speech is taken from me

As I recall quite suddenly

The things I did not try.

I failed to love my neighbor

As fully as I ought;

Next to mine, their needs forgot

And for myself did labour.

I failed to love and serve my God

With true obedience,

Had acted with indifference

Towards what should have awed.

So here I sit with head in hands

Ashamed of what I've done.

Consumed with only having fun,

I shirked divine commands.